Types of Abuse

The list below will help you recognise the signs of an abusive relationship. Not all methods of abuse are listed here though. Some are hard to define. But, if you are nervous, frightened, or anxious around your partner, then the relationship may not be equal.

Physical abuse:

Punching, hitting, biting, pinching, kicking, using weapons, pulling hair, burning, strangling, dangerous driving.

Psychological abuse:

Putting you down, not listening or responding when you talk, restricting where you can travel to or who you can see, monitoring the petrol or diesel you have used in your car or the distance you have traveled, not allowing friends or family to the house or stopping you from spending time with them, telling lies about you, lying or withholding information from you, being jealous of your other relationships with family, friends or colleagues, having other relationships, breaking promises and shared agreements, threatening to harm themselves, stalking, making threats to hurt you, your children or others you care about including pets, destroying or threatening to destroy your property, belongings or car.

Verbal abuse:

Name-calling, shouting or screaming, shouting at you in public places, insults, attempting to humiliate you, condescension, criticism, manipulation, accusations.

Sexual abuse:

Rape, unwanted sexual contact, using force or intimidation to make you perform sexual acts, making you feel guilty for not having sex, any degrading treatment based on your sexual orientation, withholding or sabotaging contraception, making you watch pornography or forcing you to participate in the making of it, sharing, or threatening to share your intimate images online.

Financial abuse:

Controlling all household money and asking you to account for money spent, denying you access to your bank account or shared bank accounts, sabotaging your work or preventing you from attending work, withholding money for food, household, or personal items, not paying bills and allowing arrears to build up, not paying child maintenance as agreed or at all

Digital abuse:

Sharing intimate and private pictures or messages online, harassing you by sending insulting or threatening texts or messages, making fake profiles to harass you, monitoring all of your online activity, checking your search history, using technology to track your whereabouts, demanding you give them your passwords to your online accounts.

Coercive control:

Coercive control is the persistent and deliberate pattern of controlling, coercive and threatening behaviour by an abuser to exert control and fear and is at the very heart of domestic abuse. It can include all or some forms of abuse such as Psychological, verbal, humiliation, intimidation, physical, financial, sexual, threats and restriction of liberty. It has a huge impact on a person’s physical and emotional well-being.