YOU ARE NOT ALONE
It is believed that one in four family units in Ireland today lives with Domestic Violence. This includes emotional, psychological, physical and sexual abuse. Abuse is not limited to any one group, it occurs in families from every financial, religious, cultural and educational background.
WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
If anyone threatens, causes, or attempts to cause harm to you – it is a crime. This type of crime includes physical, verbal, emotional, financial and sexual abuse. Physical abuse : is control by violence or threat of violence.
Physical abuse includes being slapped, punched, kicked, thrown across a room, thrown down a stairs, being stabbed, hair pulled from head, arms twisted or broken, choking to the point of loss of consciousness, injured by objects being thrown at them, being scalded, head held under water, burnt with cigarettes.
Verbal abuse is a means of putting a person down. This is done by undermining their confidence through verbally attacking them in their most vulnerable areas, either in private or public. An example of verbal abuse would be belittling the women in front of her children, her friends or her family.
Emotional abuse is the domination and control of another human being by the withdrawal of the basic human emotional needs of all of us. Emotional needs include love, respect, approval, understanding, acceptance and caring. An example of emotional abuse is inflicting the silent treatment. Financial abuse : is rooted in society’s attitude to the man as the breadwinner. The abuse of that economic power is the withdrawal from the woman of that financial means to feed, clothe or educate herself or her family.
Sexual abuse is distinctly different to physical abuse in its intentions. This includes many things, it can be as simple as a partner forcing someone to do something that they do not want to do, or watching something they don’t want to. Or the serious abuse of rape.
The above forms of abuse are used by perpetrators of abuse to gain power and control over their partners.
THE FOLLOWING IS A LIST OF SOME OF THE TACTICS USED BY ABUSERS :
INTIMIDATION – making you afraid by using looks, action, gestures, smashing objects, destroying your property, abusing pets, displaying weapons.
ISOLATION – controlling what you do, who you see and talk to, what you read, where you go, limiting your outside involvement, using jealousy to justify his actions.
MINIMISING, DENYING AND BLAMING – making light of the abuse and not taking your concern seriously, saying the abuse did not happen, shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying that you caused it.
MANIPULATION – making threats to do something to hurt you, your family or friend, threatening to leave you, to commit suicide, to report you to Social Welfare, making you do illegal things.
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